My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
