bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
