What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
