If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
