you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
