nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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