She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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