yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
