Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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