she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
