is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
