Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
