You're completely useless in the revolution.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I got inside last night via doggy door
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
