I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
