Already got asked if we're dating
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
