I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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