Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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