the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
