We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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