Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
