So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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