I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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