Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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