He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize