I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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