My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
A+ Viking dick
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
