No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
