We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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