Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
