some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize