Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Randomize
