Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
