high people should be assigned attendants
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
