There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
This baby is an asshole
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
