i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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