He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
