Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
We named our party play list daddy issues
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
