now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
too bad you live with your parents still
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
