Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
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