i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
