Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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