I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
