I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize