it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
