Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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