god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
