Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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