During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
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