im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
