We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
